It’s the perfect way to escape.
When life gets too overwhelming, it’s time to finish work, get in bed, lay down, and daydream. It’s carried me through many stormy nights.
But why do I daydream?
Other than offering relief from stress, daydreaming puts me in total control over my imaginary world.
Nothing that I cannot change can ever happen to me in my daydreams. I am the boss, the commander-in-chief, and the lord of all I survey.
When I was a kid, I used to imagine I was being interviewed by members of the press, and I used to educate them on why I wanted to become a writer, how arduous the journey was, and how I managed to beat all odds and make it big.
I gave so many of these interviews in my head that I now believe if I had spent that time honing my skill, life would have turned out differently for moi.
It was the same with arguments, scrapes, and petty quarrels with friends. I rehearsed whole arguments in my head, and in fact, I got so good at it, I think I out-argued every teenage terrorizer in my school.
Then as I grew older, I would begin to imagine “meet-cutes”, which is a term used to describe how the girl and boy in romantic comedies “meet” for the first time. I cooked up so many stories about how I would meet “the one” that I can confidently cover any likely “meet-cute” I may experience in the future.
Then I imagined fights with my unborn children and conversations with God. I waste many useful hours in mindless daydreams.
But I love it.
Daydreaming has given me a way to live out what may never be. It is that pathetic, really.
I may never be a successful, famous author. I may never be interviewed. I may never marry. I may never have kids. I may never own a house or be my own boss.
So if I can’t have these ideals in real life, there’s nothing stopping me from living them out in my head. It’s so much greater and grander in my head than it ever will be in real life. Ever felt that way?
It’s this tug-of-war in your heart that you have to deal with. What if no amount of effort ever gets you all the beautiful life-affirming things that you want?
Disappointment: it’s something we all have to face.
But should the fear of disappointment cage you into a world of make-believe?
Well, I’m with Thomas Hardy. I believe that life gives you lemons, then proceeds to give you more lemons before you have the time to squeeze lemonade out of the first batch.
I have struggled to cope with this aspect of life, and I don’t know, going forward, how I’m going to tackle it.
This piece beautifully captures the bittersweet nature of daydreaming as both a comforting escape and a potential trap. It resonates with anyone who's sought solace in imagined worlds when reality felt overwhelming. While daydreams offer control and relief, they can also create a divide between the life we envision and the one we live.
Dreams are free and give you moments of release and escape. You are the most important person in your life. Love yourself and life will be worthwhile. Then dreams can become reality.